Financial Planning

My awakening to fiscal responsibility has been, quite honestly, painful and slow. I genuinely felt for too many years that I was not interested in money, did not have to be, and could spend it with the abandon of a Dubai oil sheikh. I never minded the pennies, and the pounds certainly took care of themselves --- in other people's pockets as I spent spent spent.

And even when I had myself convinced that THIS time I had grown up, figured it out, and took care of business, I quickly realized that I was backsliding, was worse off than ever, and had to change my approach. Again.

Now, reader, I'm NOT a thick person. Academically I was stellar throughout the course of earning three advanced degrees, and my IQ is at the very high end of above average. But for some reason, I just did NOT get it when it came to money. Granted I suck at math, but really, it's so logical that you just need to get the hell out of your own way and start paying attention to how the systems function.

But now, with my goal of getting the hell out of this cubicle and out of this country, I have more motivation than I ever have before. Maturity I think has a lot to do with this, but I also must credit a couple of sage elders (namely JL, my boss, and SH, a new expat friend) for giving freely of their wisdom and advice.

More than anything, the cold hard facts are just scary. SCARY. I owe a LOT of money, a good portion of it at high interest rates. How did I let myself get this bad? How did I just not care?

Maybe it was the same Peter Pan complex that I had toward leaving college that has driven my childish attitudes toward finances. Maybe there was something a little too conservative, too square, too Republican about managing money. Or maybe I just didn't think long term, toward having goals and plans and dreams that all needed financing.

Granted, 2004 was the first time I had ever made a "grown up" salary, nearly tripling what I made as a grad student and pot head in 2003. But I didn't do much to get on track in 2004: traveling too much, buying more shoes than ANY one woman should own, and just not minding the pennies. And all of that debt seemed a little hopeless, like it was SO huge and I was just NEVER going to get it under control.

BULLSHIT! It's a choice, it's discipline, and I can friggin' do this. I do not want these debts on my back any longer, costing me money, and just being a psychic burden. Especially once I leave Chicago and head to Venezuela. So I've started. I have set up a very aggressive plan that should get me out of debt before my 27th birthday in June. That's the goal anyway. And I think I have spent enough time with the calculator that I now have a reasonable and sustainable budget for ANNIHILATING the debts of my past adventures, and freeing me financially and spiritually for all that is to come.